Dear little one
Why do you hide?
Has the world been so harsh that you can’t come outside?

Dear little one
Where did you go?
Are you hiding because someone has hurt you so?

Dear little one
I see you there.
It’s safe to come out now that I’m here.

Dear little one
How have you been?
Were you hurt by your family, a stranger, a friend?

Dear little one
How do you feel?
Acknowledging starts the pathway to heal.

Dear little one
It wasn’t your fault.
The fear that you carry feels like an assault.

Dear little one
You’re trapped no more.
Choose this day to drop the pain from before.

Dear little one
Let go of the hurt.
Forgiveness is hard but worth the effort.

Dear little one
You’re not alone.
You don’t have to carry this all on your own.

Dear little one
I’m here to empower.
To give you the strength you need in this hour.

Dear little one
Don’t be afraid.
It’s safe to come out because it’s a new day.

Dear little one
To yourself you’re attuned
but I heal the brokenhearted and will bind all the wounds.

Dear little one
It’s time to get started.
As your Father, I’ll show you The Way back to the Garden.

---

This was meant to force the reader into addressing the internal little child that was hurt so they can realize that they are not alone and they have a Father in heaven that loves them and cares for them very much so the healing can begin.

Psalm 147:3

Twisted bone. It never heals right.
Like glass it shatters. Like frost it bites.

What is this place I’ve awaken to?

Frozen feelings, shattered trust
Hardened sores that cover rust

Bound emotions in the dark
Opening wounds a freedom sparks.

Pen to paper, where to begin?
Where’d it start and when will it end?

There is a dream that I once had,
the loss of it still drives me mad,
thinking of what could have been
instead there is turmoil deep within

Fixated on dreams of yesteryear
the words I say i do not hear
they bite, bend, crack and twist
the aim was love but the arrow missed

Who I am will never know
why my dream was taken so,
I wonder if I matter to
the ones that I once thought I knew.

I put my head into my hand
and hope one day this dream still can
become alive in my real life
and not just fill my head with strife

I try to stop my mind from chasing
so i tell others of the racing
but when I speak the people scatter
and treat me like I dont matter

Anger bites my tongue in two
and spews onto the people who
with all my life I have spent
because I fear abandonment

The cycle then begins again
and I am left without a friend
words are said that make me mad
because of a dream that I once had

There! I said it! now you know
what’s inside my head so
does it mean that you will care
or treat me how I think is fair?

---

The world is quiet and full of fear
I worry that things will not work out
Alone trying to find my path
Lost in a mind that’s filled with doubt.

At first connection was my aim
Inviting people into my space
Late night chats and curious connections
Made the world a bit easier to face

Book of people that I know
In a community that doesn’t speak
Watching from a safe distance
Growing a generation of the weak

Mind your business publicly
It’s now a world of noise and fame
Secret test on society
Connected to a chaos hard to tame

False connection turned to addiction
Filled with faces of the past
No where to find real connection
From pictures that do not last

Share,like, share, scroll, share, follow, share.
click, read, next, scroll, back, interesting, share.
What time is it?
share, scroll, next, scroll, watch, scroll, share.

Stop. What am I doing?
Breathe. Why am I here?
Wait. What am I missing?
Delete. Will it quiet the fear?

…

[ Silence ]

…

With clarity came contentment
With a quickened mind, peace
Disconnected from a community of chaos
Finally i can breathe with ease.

The world is quiet again
But I don’t feel so alone now
The fear I once had inside
With open eyes feels gone. How?

Our creator created creatures
who were created to crave connection
Connection filled with chaos
Creates creatures who need direction

Renewed and focused without the noise
I got out of the social machine
Connected to what matters most
The world is quiet again.

---

I wrote this when I deleted my facebook account. It felt like the end of an era. I started on Myspace and chatting online and transitioned to facebook like many others. It took me years to finally decide to have the courage to delete because there is something about feeling the connection to others that keeps you coming back.

When the sky opened, the rain came. 
Water destroyed what we made
The house was filled
Some dreams were killed
As our belongings started to fade

When the sky closed, the pain came.
Igniting the fear from the past
Flooding the ground
Destroying the town
A reminder that nothing will last.

When the sky opens, the rain comes
A reminder of what was once ours
Days turned to years
We learned from our fears
We healed but still there are scars

When the sky closes, the light shines
reminding us of pain that subsides
some memories sad
others, not bad
but peace is whats left behind.

When the sky opens, the rain comes.
Watering the ground to bring growth
Beauty does follow,
as the world seems less hollow
Bringing new life from the earth. 

Though the wages of sin is death
we choose to take another breath,
we take another stride
for nothing more than pride.

To make another buck,
with which we’re so love struck,
we stand and fight with those
whose emptiness only grows.

We never realize
there was a race, there was a prize.
There was a man up on a tree
to give us life for free.

All we had to do was look
to see the love it took
to know the weight of sin
and destroy the hold within.

A love that will consume
the heart of a groom.
A love He cannot hide
His love of His bride.

Notes: this is a poem of desperation. When everything around Seems like its falling apart, sometime all you want to do is run and hide. God is always there, even if you hide or run and He will Show you the way through your struggle.

---

Hide me away oh Lord, find me a way.
Show me the way oh Lord, teach me to pray.
The way starts to wind oh Lord, from day to day.
Hide me away oh Lord, hide me away.
I can’t always run from the things that I fear.
The words of the wicked are the words that I hear.
The charms and the tricks from the mouth they all fly.
Hide me away oh Lord, from the deceptive lie.
Show me truth in this world I do not know.
Teach me to love and Your love I will show.
Bring to my heart a most beautiful sound.
Forgiveness and love shall I wear as a crown.
Until ashes to ashes and dust to dust.
Hide me away oh Lord, from the tarnish and rust.
Show me Your glory, day after day,
But hide me away oh Lord, find me the way.

my eyes burn this night
as i see only you

and i sit in this light
as i fade into blue

my heart breaks in two
when its out on my sleeve

your loves always true
and you made me believe

i transformed my eyes
to a dreamers remorse

i held onto love
and was thrown from my course

now back, here i am
on the path i once walked

and back in the place
where God and i talked

here i will stay
till His day of return

this choice i have made
and now its your turn

on the pillow i lay
as my heart skiped a beat
i was dreaming a dream
and was deep in my sleep

i knew when i woke
i would never forget
this dream was so real
as dreams all can get

in the dream was a girl
in a flowing white gown
she stood above me
as i lay on the ground

i saw her face shine
like the brightest of stars
then realized she was
from the farthest of fars

her face was so pure
like depths of the sea
she showed me her heart
as it beat just for me

then i noticed a sound
like the rushing of flame
the silence was calm
and she called out a name

the name was like none
i ever had heard
the most powerful name
and most powerful word

all bowed to their knee
as i stood oblivious
she introduced Him
and said this is Jesus

HE is King Of all kings
and Lord of all lords
His voice cuts the lies
just like two edged swords

my heart skipped a beat
as she uttered this phrase
i knew then my life
was destined for change

suddenly i woke
the dream still in mind
then it fell out of site
as i opened my eyes

i thought never again
would i look on His face
until i got back
to my dream of that place

i asked her how to get
to the place i had been
i knew in is love
is where all would begin

her words that night
seemed so far away
but then she pointed to Him
and told me He is The Way

tonight i searched my soul
and found an empty shell
saw myself walking a wire
then suddenly i fell

falling to what i didnt know
but i knew it wasnt right
i knew i shouldnt be in this place
but here i was this night

as i sat there at the bar
waiting for my cue
You were once my insperation
and i knew i needed You

i felt the blindness fade away
and finally realized where i was
i never wanted to be here
but here i was just because

the darkness faded slowly
as i walked out of that place
i left that world behind me
and You i once again embrassed

once again your love
was covering my soul
once again a broken vessel
waitng for You to mold

driveing home that night
was the longest road i took
the noise seemed almost endless
and i had to take a second look

i looked back at the time i spent
getting to that place
and remembered in my youth
i dreamed of looking on Your face

my dreams were comming back again
and Your now all i can see
Your light shines bright inside my heart
and there Youll always be.

my heart cant take the breaking
from this earth thats always shaking

moving my feet from under me
my world just starts its quaking

the world keeps moving faster
i dont know if i can last here

sometimes it more than i can take
im just trying to get past here

i hope this cant go higher
while im walking on this wire

as i look down, its all around
i see an ever burning fire

im wanting to escape this
see that beyond the pearly gate is

a God who washes all sins away
and drys tears on all the faces

a love without condition
to live within conviction

this is the life of which i strive
living in the great commission

praising the one above me
and knowing HE still loves me

died so we could live life anew
and there is no one above HE.

note: this is my view on an experience i once had…although I didn’t physically go through these things i feel like mentally i have experienced it. so basically its an experience of someone that is being saved and seeing Jesus for what he really is for the first time and coming to Him and changing there life according to His will. Jesus is and always will be my best friend and i want to show others the same love and grace He has shown me in my life.

there at the alter
is where we first met

and its there at the alter
that ill never forget

the tears of the lonely
is all i could cry

its there at the alter
i saw life passing by

there at the alter
He took all the pain

His arms draped around
as i hid in my shame

its there at the alter
i found a new way

and there in the room
on the floor i did lay

trembleing in fear
as i lay on the floor

the experience was new
but i still wanted more

it felt like nothing
i had ever been through

not a drug in this world
nor the things i would do

i asked for redemtion
as i crawled to my knees

the man that i saw
said He had paid all my fees

HE told me a story
of how he died long ago

and rose from the dead
so everyone would know

He said i was born a sinner
and my debts had been paid

and now in his glory
at the alter i laid

there at the alter
is where i saw grace

His glory around me
His love filled the place

there at the alter
i realized my sin

and its there at the alter
where i met my best friend

i saw it once in a dream
its beauty like none else

it surounded me with intensity
as i clinged to myself

no one was around me
as i lay crying on the floor

as i felt the weight get stronger
and knew i needed something more

stuck here in this dream of mine
the changes all began

one face showed a broken heart
as the other showed a man

He stood there pointing out the way
and the path that i should take

if i didnt follow Him
i knew his heart would break

everyone was there with me
and still i felt alone

i looked around and saw the crowd
and how big it all had grown

although they were all standing there
i knew they couldnt see

how alone i really was
and how nothing seemed like me

the stars are what showed me the way
in the darkest part of night

the hurt inside my heart
somehow had found the light

the deapest part of everything
is where the beauty lies

and when we all get to the end
we will find our whys

this dream is deep inside my mind
and sometimes its all i see

i will follow Him to the end
and let Him know its me

when my mind starts wondering
but has nowhere to go i will tell this dream of mine
because this dream is all i know

note: this poem isnt about anyone in particular. its just me thinking and knowing how i would want this type of relationship to be..

heres to never feeling broken
when held inside her grasp

and always understanding
and knowing it will last

heres to looking in her eyes
and seeing true loves kiss

and looking even deeper
and being what she will miss

heres to dreaming of her touch
and never letting go

dreams are sometimes infanant
when love is all you show

heres to a love so unconditional
and helping with the pain

and understanding why
you just kissed her in the rain

heres to haveing no more lies
and knowing all her regrets

to seeing all the flaws she has
and having no secrets

heres to knowing shes there for you
and knowing she’ll never leave

and treating her like she deserves
nothing less than a queen

heres to her crying on your shoulder
as you wipe away the tears

and seeing all the little things
and knowing all her fears

heres to looking back at life
and remembering the past

and thinking things to yourself
like how long it will last

heres to dreams and adoration
and abundance in this life

and above all heres to who i descirbe
because this letters to my wife

tomorrow is always a day away
when the trouble is today

hoping for a better tomorrow
it still wont come this way

i try looking to the horizon
but there i always find

tomorrow is always a day away
when today is left behind

saving things for tomorrow
why finish them today

after all is said and done
tomorrows another day

but will tomorrow reach here and now
while we live our life this way it cant become more than it was
when its always a day away

broken hearts and fireflies are running through my mind
dreaming of a light inside with nothing left behind

open to the world around and hanging by a thread
dreaming of the day to come while trapt inside my head

falling down the rabbit hole into the earth below
why are the feet of everyone all going with the flow

standing up i see the truth and fight against the crowd
i scream louder than everyone but still they seem so loud

reaching out so far i hear them scream louder than me
they just dont understand life with its inconsistency

just like me there reaching out to find the only way
hoping to admit the truth and understand today

touching the crouded emptyness of an empty broken mind
show the truth and love and show the light of God inside

pray the better day will come and darkness will depart
hope for understanding to relieve the broken heart

if they could only see the only thing they cant ignore
i wish they would just hear this single voice below the roar

one day closer to writing it down
one day closer to loosing the frown
one day closer to the fountain of youth
one day closer to seeing the truth

one day away from the stones that were thrown
one day away from the hurt thats been shown
one day away from it all comming true
one day away from starting anew

one day closer to taking the lead
one day closer to the day that you need
one day away from the on comming day
always one day closer and still one day away

To make the pain all go away
and avoid the stress of the passing day
you live, you love, you hope, you trust
we do the things that we must
you dream, you feel, you smile, you cry,
you understand the reasons why,
sheltered from the passing day
you pray to hope and hope to pray
you never find the way to be
you try to find a heart thats free
you follow truth and its winding way
you taste, you see, you bleed, you stray
you hurt, you draw, you sleep, you fight
you live, you love, you learn , I write.

i look at my rhymes and my past
and i thought those feelings would always last

I never saw my failing love
as a ending spectrum from above

it seemed so perfect and so new
i turned to red from black and blue

i hesitated when it was done
because i thought it had just begun

i wanted to make it clean and neat
but broke when i heard of her retreat

i knew the day would never last
and then i looked back to the past

i saw the things i had been through
and to the list i added you

you taught me things i never knew
i learned things i could only learn from you

i look back now and i must insure
the bigest effect was my character

we go through life not knowing things
but prepare for the things that all life brings

in the end when we see the truth
we may hang on both nail and tooth

but remember life will still proceed
because what i once had i no longer need

i grew up, moved on, found life again
and through all these things you remained my friend

if there were away to know what tomorrow brings
would you really want to know it
would you be the best at everything
and not be afraid to show it
or would the day start like it began
and and you just find another way
just live this day like it counts the most
cause tomorrows another day

its hard feeling like i want to cry
but not knowing how or knowing why
i wish sometime the tears would flow
but then i sit there and they just wont go
i feel the pain inside my mind
its full of hurt and things i cant find
the answers i wish would just come
i sit there and think im overrun
i need a way to ease the pain
to take away the guilt and shame
i need to cry but i cant
its like lifes a bird and im the ant

ts comming out of the crowd and giving your heart
its loving the ones that have torn you apart
its helping the broken and finding the true
its giving more of yourself and keeping less of you

its not robbing from the rich to give to the poor
or defiance of the government that knocks on your door
its not hurting people because of the pain they’ve caused you
or remembering there past when they’ve change and are new

its whats more real to me then it ever has been
through the blood and the nails He carried the sin
the weight of the world was laid on his back
as He carried the load and he heard the whips crack

its following His heart as hung on the tree
and realizing he was there so we could be free
its so we would have a chance to make the right choice
its so His word could be heard because we are His voice

when you look at how life begins and ends
you relize between there are many friends
friends will come and friends will go
but through it all you should always know
that there is one friend that will always be
He is there for you and there for me
He make us know he will never leave
and all He asks is that we believe
so when your going through a trying time
relize Jesus is there right by your side
hes always there and will never leave
and he cares for you even when you cant see

dream like nothing hurts you there
see the things that you don’t fear
love the ones you learned to hate
trust beyond the pearly gate
live with all intentions good
make sure that your understood
view your life in others eyes
and feel the flutter of butterflies
see the path of least distraction
find the peace beyond the action
realize truth will find your face
and live in Gods mercy and His grace

Worried about nothing
Helpless to move on
Looking to another
To make the worry all seem gone

Looking to the Father
To find strength to pass right through
Hoping to discover
Yourself inside the blue

Needing a way to lighten
The heavy load you have just made
The stress is over taking
Your mind you want to trade

Trade for a better one
With things already worked out
Or maybe you’ll just keep this one
And just loose the worry and doubt

it bleeds when its broken
hurts when it bleeds
and feels all the pains of
the one that it needs

it makes anger subside
and the pains go away
with the turns of the tides
it reveals the true way

its beauty is endless
and makes the world seem so new
and i only can think
of my future with you

it doesnt make sence
the way that i feel
but its the way that i feel
that makes life seem so real

your mind is so perfect
as i dream of the rest
ill try calming it down
as it beats out my chest

its makes the world seem
like its falling apart
but in the end what is true
is that it is my heart

Im sorry for the imperfections
Im sorry for the loss
Im sorry for not saying hello
when our paths do cross
Im sorry for the hurt
Im sorry for the rain
Im sorry I wasnt there
when you were filled with so much pain
I hope that i can make it
better than it was
If I cant I hope your happy
and that you find the one you love
and if you never find him
I will still be here
with my hand out to hold
to comfort you in your fear.

The brightness of the day thats gone
is shining through the clouds
The longing of the day to come
burns off every shroud
the willingness to move on
will one day find your face
the love that once burned bright inside
you’ll once again embrace
The heart that once was ripped apart
will trust the love once more
but still the love will linger on
and pierce your very core

silent whispers in my ear
i know what they mean but i cannot hear
the words are silent but yet so bright
they pass threw the cold and the dead of night
they make you feel the truth that lies
just beyond those mournful cries
they fill you up to unbelief
and return you to the point of grief
the mind will find a truth to see
and you will find your way to be

Is there a place inside of you that no one knows about? A place that you hide all your fears and never let them out. All your secrets all your pain and all of your regrets. You keep them all bottled up so maybe you’ll forget. But how can you forget the mistakes that made you who you are? All of those are things that brought you thus far. If you can’t remember who you are and where you’ve been. Then you will be left standing with your soul blowing in the wind. Tattered and torn from all the secrets and pains you fall on your knees from the weight of your shames. Not knowing that there is a way of reprieve. You don’t understand that all you have to do is believe. Believe in the cross and what Jesus did there and no more will you be left standing there. Just fall on your knees and admit to the truth and follow God’s words without your reproof. He died for us so that we could live free. Not only for you but also for me. So search the place inside that only you know and give it to God, let it all go. If you do all of this then you will understand. The words of The God and the death of The Man.

Echoes within filter out the sound to the point that I cant hear the tears falling down to the bottom of an empty soul filled with a fear that is out of control spiraling through an endless abyss yet caught up in the things im not wanting to miss though I do because there is no way to see the things locked inside and the truth about me is that there is no more to this mystery because when you understand my mind you understand me.